Heroes
by crazyForJames
Summary: Starbuck contemplates the meaning of a hero and what it means to him... R/R please! Short 1 chapter only...


Heroes  
written September, 1998  
  
Twenty young faces looked up at me with eager fascination.  
  
Their eyes twinkled at me. The only thing I could think was, *Stars above. How the heck did I get talked into this one?*  
  
Some of their eyes were attentive and bright. Some were glazed over in wistful imagination of exploits unknown. All of them were thinking of me. Me. Lowly me. The words "hero" and "adore" and "admire" were floating around, and somehow I didn't think they applied to me. I could not shake the surreal feeling coursing through me.  
  
It was "Hero Day" at the local instruction room, and they elected me to come and talk to these young ones. My mind could not keep from wondering how I got myself into this one, and now I felt very uncomfortable with it. The instructor sensed my awkwardness and eased things a bit by switching the format to questions and answers. After that, things went a bit easier and I talked a bit more freely. Somehow, the instructor had caught onto the uneasiness I have about talking about myself.  
  
Then the break came. All those bright faces came up to me and asked me for my autograph on whatever they deemed appropriate to them. I signed all of it in a daze, and as they filed out into the play area, I reflected about the event.   
  
Heck, I'm just some guy from nowhere. Before meeting Adama, in fact, I had no home and no family to call my own. Oh sure, I've lived in lots of houses and with lots of people, but nothing I would have called "home."  
  
The instructor broke my reverie. She just looked me square in the eye as I leaned back against her desk. She made sure she had my full attention and simply stated, "It's true."  
  
"Huh?" was the only useful reply I could come up with at the time.   
  
"You are a hero," she said and added, "at the very least, in the minds of these young people who look up to you." Then she just walked away with a smile. Somehow, she must have felt I needed that extra bit of reassurance. I have to say I felt a little stunned that she seemed to have read my mind.  
  
I looked around to the play area and smiled at the chaos of kids all chatting about their treasures. Treasures that included my signature. Imagine that. I sighed and hovered around the play area for a while, answering more questions about vipers and cylons until instructional period was to begin again. I said farewell to the children and waved as they shouted their joyful goodbye's. I could imagine that instructional period would probably be pretty haphazard after that.  
  
Words like 'hero' and 'star athlete' wandered through my mind for a while as I puttered around after I got back to the /Galactica/. I still had a couple of days left to my furlon and I didn't feel like hanging out at all the usual places right now. Things were nagging on the edge of my consciousness, and I couldn't seem to shake the weird emotion that was playing out within my being.  
  
As it started to get toward later in the cycle, I came to the realization that certain parties might seek out my company soon. I still felt like being alone, so I thought I'd check out the observation tower. It might  
be empty right now, and if I got there first, I could hang the secret 'do not disturb' symbol outside the hatchway and get some peace.  
  
I made my way through the engine area to the access way. In spite of the earcovering, the roar of the mighty /Galactica's/ powerful engines could still be heard as a low roar. I found the hatch unlocked and poked my head inside.  
  
Well, the tower was not empty as I'd hoped, but the occupant spotted me and waved me to come inside. The lights were dim and Boomer was all alone, so I figured I might as well. Boomer was leaning over some device  
in the middle of the floor, and I turned to close the hatch behind me.   
  
As soon as the hatch was closed, I slipped off my earcovers. The music permeated my ears as soon as I did so. I looked down as I recognized the music of one of those 'blues' bands. I looked around for the source, and it seems Boomer had found an old audcardplayer and a few old cards. The melody was melancholy, and as I glanced up, I noticed Boomer was too.  
  
Good, at least I'm not alone. He was on furlon too, but I knew he would be on 'standby' tomorrow.  
  
He did not say anything to me, but scanned my own body language and nodded with that sympathetic half-smile of understanding. He offered me a bottle of baharrii from his fourcase on the floor. I didn't ask him where he got these things. We never ask each other _those_ questions. He picked up the first one and slid down the wall to sit on the  
floor.   
  
He had a far-away look on his face and was quiet. I am fairly used to this mood from him every once in a great while, so I knew what to do. I grabbed one of the bottles, said nothing and sat on the floor a meter or so away from him.  
  
He leaned back and listened to the music, and I decided to do the same. We listened, we drank and we said nothing. Just like in the old days where we had a few short cycles of furlon in a strange place and nothing  
to do. That was before Apollo came on board and tried to keep us lively.  
  
Sometimes Boomer and I would spend an entire cycle doing everything and nothing and not speaking much. Just enjoying the comfortable camaraderie and the presence of a like spirit. Ah... those were the days. I sat back now to enjoy this all too infrequent moment and acknowledged that just having each other as friends was really nice.  
  
We relaxed and sipped in silence. My mind kept drifting back to the whole 'hero' thing, and it revolved around in chaotic circles in my consciousness. Right after opening the second bottle of baharrii, a wave of exhaustion washed over me before I'd sorted it all out.  
  
Next thing I know is that I must have drifted off. Funny thing was that Boomer must have drifted off too, and fairly soon I woke to the sound of him shuffling his feet with a funny kind of dazed look to him. He looked at me, smiled and we both laughed.  
  
I ran my hands through my hair, stretched and rubbed my face briskly to encourage awakening. He did the same. We discovered that all the baharrii was gone, and the few audcards that Boomer had found had long begun to repeat themselves. I reached over and switched it off.  
  
"Enough moping, I think," Boomer said and flashed a smile to signal me that whatever melancholy thing had possessed him earlier had passed. He certainly looked as though he was feeling much better now. I smiled  
back, signaling that my mood had passed, too. I was surprised to find that it really had.  
  
Boomer rose to his feet and checked his chrono. "I'd better high tail it to the Rising Star. I promised Dietra a centar or two of my undivided attention after her duty period."  
  
I nodded and told him that I had promised Cassie the same thing, some late cycle this furlon, anyhow. I looked down at my own chrono and added that she would'nt be off for another half-centar, however.  
  
Boomer nodded to the audcardplayer sitting on the floor between us, "Can you stash those things for me?"  
  
"Sure, no problem," I said and smiled, "Better get out of here, Boom old buddy, before you get your tail roasted." He flashed me one of those famous 'better watch it' looks, but smiled and rolled his eyes. He fetched up his earcovering from the floor and waved happily as he started out the hatch and down the ladder. The hatchway sealed again and afforded me silence.  
  
I looked around the room and decided the best place to put the player would probably be the emergency supply storage locker. I slowly rose to my feet and placed it in. I made a mental note to myself to tell Boomer and the select few others that we shared this special room with where it was later. Maybe some of the others could locate a few more audcards. Maybe some slow dance ones, and I smiled to myself as I imagined enjoying a few slow dances up here with Cassie with the stars as our backdrop. My comfort with the thought even surprised me.  
  
I took one last long breath before reaching down for my own earcovering.  
  
The thought struck me that maybe, just maybe, in some small way I was a hero. Cassie sure made me feel that way. Anyhow, my mind seemed resolved to not mull it over anymore and just accept the wonderful compliment that I had been given. Somehow, a new wind of energy flowed through me, and I left the chamber eagerly wanting to share the feeling. 


End file.
